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Uvalde Police Demand To Know Why Gun Control Is Taking So Long To Get Here


UVALDE,
TX — Unhappy, wealthy, coastal liberals are waiting and waiting for sweeping
gun control laws and the members of the Uvalde police department are furious
with all the inaction.

“What
on earth is taking them so long! This
is outrageous!” Yelled the chief of police at congress. “We pay them to protect us and they’re just standing
around? What, is the Capitol
door locked or something? They
should knock that sucker down, get in there and immediately get it done! Lives are at stake for goodness sake!”

Now, if Washington fails to
act, the Uvalde police force is threatening to no longer protect the local
citizens from danger.

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“If
they don’t act, you can say goodbye to the famous blanket of safety we cover
our county with. How
about that? Can you imagine?” the sheriff said while handing out
traffic tickets.

Update: Dozens of Republicans
rushed to the Capitol with a plan to bolster schools with proper security and
armed guards but the Uvalde Police promptly arrested them.

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