LOUISVILLE, Kentucky – (Sports Satire) – The world’s greatest thoroughbred racehorse trainer has just purchased a horse from Sarah Ferguson, aka Fergie, of the infamous toe-sucking scandal Fergie.
Bob Baffert, who has won more races than Taylor Swift has had boyfriends, disclosed that after having an extensive man-to-horse talk with “Sir Scrotum” he (Baffert) feels like he (Sir Scrotum) could be a future Kentucky Derby, Preakness, and Belmont Stakes winner.
Baffy noted that his new horse only has 3 and a ½ hooves, but he can run as fast as any horse that he has ever seen with 4 hooves.
Baffert noted that since “Sir Scrotum’s” dick is extremely large, it will have a tendency of slowing him down a bit, but the good thing is that because of his well-endowed prick, the horse will definitely distract every one of the female thoroughbreds in the race. ■
