Getting your dating app profile in tip-top shape can be a challenge, especially if you’re not a writer or aren’t great at talking about yourself. Trust me, I get it. In light of that, you’ve probably noticed that I like to share quite a few articles about how to improve your dating app profile.
Today, I want to continue that trend, but I want to focus more on things NOT to do. Through my work in the industry, I’ve seen literally tens of thousands of online dating profiles (not exaggerating that number). Through this, I’ve been able to see trends, see what works, and more importantly, see what phrases in your profile might be destroying the quality and quantity of your results.
What I’d like to do is outline a few of the most overused phrases in dating profiles and tell you why you should stop using them.
“I’m not very good at these…”
I can’t tell you how many times I’ve seen people lead off their dating app profile telling the reader about how they aren’t good at them, how they hate doing them, or how they aren’t very good at talking about themselves.
Look, I get it. Seriously, I do. However, this is incredibly overused, and even if it weren’t, it does you no good.
All it does is start your profile off on a negative note. The first thing you want to do when introducing yourself isn’t to talk about things you hate, or things you aren’t good at. You should be focusing on the positives.
Additionally, by telling your other matches that what they are about to read is no good, you prime their mind to expect it to be terrible.
This one has got to go.
Any cute cliche
Cute cliches are fun, yes. Think things like partner in crime, fluent in sarcasm, etc. The problem? These get overused all the time. The second your match sees you say something they heard someone else say, you look unoriginal and subconscious feelings that you might be “copying” someone else start to creep in.
Try your best to be original and focus your entire dating profile on information about you. Leave the quotes, cliches, and anything like that out of the equation. You’ll never know how often it’s being used by other users because you can only see your profile and those of the people you’re interested in.
“My ex…”
Thankfully, this one is slowly becoming less overused, but it is still enough for me to mention it.
There are absolutely zero reasons ever that you need to share about your ex in your dating profile.
Yes, there may be instances where after you start talking you may have to share something (rare), but these never need to be in the first impression you’re leaving on your dating profile. Save that for private messages or in-person conversation.
Cliche hobbies without extra details
This is going to be an interesting one because I don’t think you should leave a hobby off of your dating profile just because it’s super common. That said, the takeaway here is including specific examples and details to make it unique.
Here’s the best example. Hiking. For some reason, people LOVE to say they like to hike, even if they only went hiking once in the last 10 years. But what happens if you love hiking? How can you include this in your profile without seeming like you’re a redundant sheep?
Add a pertinent detail. Instead of saying “I like to go hiking”, you could day something like, “I like to go hiking a few times a month, especially when the weather is nice.” It’s nothing too specific that compromises your security (like exactly where you hike), but it’s enough to make it stand out from the crowd.
Look at all of your hobbies this way and add a few pertinent details with each. Not only does this avoid looking like you’re on team redundancy, but it also is going to make your profile better!
Don’t overthink it
At the end of the day, this is something you could heavily overthink. Try your best to put your best foot forward, and you’ll be fine. If you need some extra help, you can always check out our dating profile examples or our guide on writing the perfect dating profile.
Jason Lee
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