Until he died in 1992, Brenner’s child’s eye for wonder and killer’s nose for the pretentious, rocketed Channel 9 to the top of the ratings
WASHINGTON — In case you missed it, this year marks WUSA9’s 75th anniversary. And as we gear up for Super Bowl LVIII, we can’t help but think back to the legendary WUSA9 sportscaster, Glenn Brenner.
The Big Game was always a chance to showcase his humor – and his hijinks.
“Coffee! Actually in your room! Why didn’t I think of that?” Glenn said, smacking his head as he stood in front of a sign advertising in-room coffee outside a hotel near the Super Bowl stadium.
Glenn took a huge crew with him for Washington’s three trips to the Championship in the 1980s. Tweaking the corporate accountants who scrutinized his expense report, he collected everyone on camera to sing Auld Lang Syne and brag, “These 16 men rang up the highest hotel bill in the history of Western civilization!”
Ever the jokester, Glenn charged that hotel bill to the sports anchor at Channel 4, George Michael – who somehow adored him anyway.
“The measure of any man is how much he is loved. And I assure you there is no wealthier man going to heaven than Glenn Brenner,” Michael told viewers, his voice breaking, the day Glenn died, January 14, 1992.
“Literally, as a kid, I knew at 6:42, we were close to Glenn Brenner time,” said WUSA9 current sports anchor, Chick Hernandez, who grew up watching Glenn, and even interned for him. “You can’t not smile, thinking about him,” said Chick.
When Chick took Glenn’s chair, he taped just one picture to his screen.
“I think he’d say, ‘What are you doing here?’ that’s what he’d say. With a smile, and a wink,” Chick said, emotional even after all these years.
When the sports news was slow, Glenn would just go out and tape funny bits to broadcast. One of the most hilarious starts with him having coffee at a café and trying to get out of paying by putting his newly-won Emmy statuette on the table.
The next scene shows him whistling while driving into work with the Emmy taped to the hood of his car.
“You can’t park here, this is the general manager’s spot,” Photographer Bruce Bookhultz told him. “Not anymore, pally!” Glenn responded, patting Bookhultz’s cheek.
Glenn was the most popular, highest-paid sports anchor in the city – pulling down nearly $ 1 million a year. His contract with Channel 9 also included a $1-million life insurance policy and a promise to pay his children’s college tuition.
News anchor Gordon Peterson said Glenn had a kid’s eye for the wonder of life, and a killer’s nose for the pompous and pretentious.
“He looks like an anchorman for SeaWorld, doesn’t he!” Glenn told Gordon one night when Gordon went on the air wearing a lime-green sports coat. Glenn slapped his arms together and whooped like a seal while Gordon just laughed.
Another famous bit had Glenn riding around in the Oscar Meyer Weinermobile, sticking his head out of the top and admitting to feeling a little ridiculous. When a police officer stops him, Glenn asks, “What’s the charge officer?” “You’ve got a large weenie on the street,” the cop responds. “My weenie is too big? An oversized weenie?” Glenn jokes.
When the boxer George Foreman came in for an interview, Glenn ordered his favorite meal. “He certainly perked up after the food arrived!” Glenn joked as Foreman stuffed himself. “I need some bread!” the boxer joked back.
One night when Mike Buchanan was filling in as anchor and he lost his place, Glenn took the dozens of scripts Mike had spread across the desk and pushed them on the floor. “You think anchoring is easy? Try it now!’ he told Mike as both of them roared with laughter.
Glenn frequently turned to the cloistered nun, Sister Marie Louise Kirkland, whom he called “Weezie.” to predict game winners for the upcoming weekend. She had a better record than many of his other “mystery prognosticators.”
“Now here’s one I think I know who you’re going to pick. The New Orleans Saints at…” Glenn said one night. “Now you say that just because it’s Saints. Sometimes I don’t go on with the Saints. They fool you,” she told him, before going with the Saints.
He could even get the regal and serious news anchor Maureen Bunyan to play along. Dressed up in a fedora and smoking a cigar, Maureen picked Kansas City, because, “I love the music in Kansas City.”
James Brown, anchor of The NFL Today on CBS, did weekends at Channel 9 while Glenn was doing weekdays.
“You can see he’s in the spirit. No tie, a little cleavage showing,” Glenn joked with JB on one satellite remote. “How can you not talk about Glenn with a smile?” JB said about him.
Glenn’s bosses were convinced he brought in thousands of viewers, and they played that up in one promo with Gordon. Gordon takes a phone call and tries to get off the line, but the caller won’t get off until he talks to Glenn. “He says he would do anything to talk sports with ‘the man.'” Gordon tells Glenn. “It’s what I’ve been telling you all along Sparky. They have to watch you. They love to watch me,” Glenn responds.
Glenn collapsed after finishing his second Marine Corps Marathon and died in January 1992 from an inoperable brain tumor.
“I want to tell you the truth about his final days. He suffered. He suffered,” Gordon said on the newscast the next day.
The late Washington football team owner Jack Kent Cooke summed up how fans from the stadium to the White House to the streets felt. “He truly was one of a kind. That mold is broken. God bless you Glenn Brenner,” said Cooke.
One of the last people to visit Glenn in the hospital was Sister Marie Louise, along with Gordon, as described by Washingtonian reporter Barbara Matusow:
“For Peterson, the most emotional moment came during the appearance of a most unlikely visitor. As he was standing in the hall, he spotted Sister Marie Louise, one of Brenner’s favorite ‘Guest Prognosticators,’ heading toward him. A cloistered nun at Georgetown Visitation, she had seldom been out of the convent since the 1930s. Brenner had once sought the intervention of church authorities to allow her to attend a Redskins game, but she wasn’t permitted to go.
‘”How the hell did she get out?’ Peterson wondered as she approached. ‘Did she scale the wall?’
“‘Hi, Weezie,’ Peterson said, hoping she wouldn’t think he was too fresh for using her nickname.
“‘Hi, honey,’ she answered. ‘I’m praying for a miracle, and I better get one.’
“Peterson motioned her inside.
“‘Hey, Glenn, Weezie’s here,’ he said softly. Suddenly, Brenner opened his eyes, made his trademark half-wink, half-grimace, and waved. Everyone in the room gasped.
“Peterson fell apart. ‘If it hadn’t been for someone holding me up, I would have passed out. I think I’m getting more spiritual as I get older, but I honestly sensed the presence of God in the room at that moment.'”
Glenn died at 44 and is survived by his wife, Suzie, and their three children.
