What are the 5 stages of a breakup?

DABDA is the acronym most often used to describe the five stages of a breakup:

The five stages of a breakup are denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. Each stage can be experienced in different ways and at different times, and not everyone goes through all of them. Some people may skip a stage or cycle back and forth between two or more stages.

The denial stage is often characterized by disbelief. The person may not want to believe that the relationship is over and may cling to any sign that it is still alive. It is common to see this stage expressed through denial of the breakup, refusal to discuss the break-up, or avoidance of anything that might remind the person of the relationship. Also common during this stage is the belief that the breakup can be reversed or that things will somehow work out.

The anger stage is marked by feelings of rage and betrayal. The person may lash out at their partner or anyone they feel is responsible for the breakup. It is common to see this stage expressed through blame, insults, and threats. The goal during this stage is often to hurt the other person as much as possible. Also common is the feeling of being overwhelmed by negative emotions.

The bargaining stage often follows anger and is marked by an attempt to fix the relationship and is often characterized by an attempt to plead or bargain with the other person. The person may offer to change their behavior. It is common to see this stage expressed through attempts to get the other person to take the breakup back, promises to change, and offers of continued love and support. The goal during this stage is to keep the relationship together, even if it is only on the person’s terms.

The depression stage is marked by feelings of sadness and loss. The person may feel like they can’t go on without their partner and may have difficulty eating or sleeping. It is common to see this stage expressed through feelings of hopelessness, worthlessness, and self-pity. The goal during this stage is often to find a way to cope with the pain.

The acceptance stage is often marked by a sense of relief. The person has come to terms with the breakup and has accepted that it is over. It is common to see this stage expressed through a feeling of sadness or nostalgia. The goal during this stage is to move on with their life.

Now that’s you know the five stages of a breakup, it’s important to be aware of what to expect. If you are going through a breakup, know that you are not alone. Don’t be afraid to ask for help. Talk to your friends and family, or seek out professional help if you need it.

Going through the DABDA stages is not a linear process. You may cycle through them multiple times or jump from one to another. It is important to be patient with yourself and give yourself the time you need to heal.

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