How to Handle Mixed Signals in Early Dating

The early part of relationships is a healthy mix of having fun while also trying to figure out how the other person is feeling and what is going on. When you’ve been dating someone for a long time, it can become pretty easy to know what they are thinking and how they are feeling. However, early in a relationship, there can be a lot of mixed signals (both intentional and unintentional) that you need to know how to navigate. 

Today, I want to give you a few quick strategies to help you handle mixed signals in the early dating process. 

The supreme answer is always to ask. 

While I will share a few more tips, none of them will compare to this first one. 

The single best way to navigate mixed signals in early dating is to have a conversation and ask the other person to clarify. 

Seriously, I’m not trying to oversimplify this or be snarky in any way. When you aren’t sure how someone else is feeling or what they meant by something, you should ask them.  

Now, there are a few small caveats to this. The biggest, or should I say the littlest, is that you shouldn’t be asking for clarification on little things all the time. If every single time they do something little you try and read too deeply into it, you don’t want to be asking them 10 times a day to clarify. They are going to start to think there is something not right with you and you do have the potential to scare them off. 

But, that said, from time to time if there are bigger things that you are unsure about, just have a conversation with them and ask.  

Don’t beat around the bush. Ask them directly and save yourself the hours of over analyzation and worry. 

It really is that simple. 

With that said, now I want to share a few supporting tips that can also help cut through the noise. Please, though, remember that these all pale in comparison to this first one. 

Don’t overanalyze everything. 

This is probably easier said than done, but it has to be said. If you are overanalyzing every little thing that happens and finding mixed signals in the tiniest of things, you have to try and stop.  

Often, and this may not be the case for you, but often this stems from self-esteem challenges and fears that everyone you talk to or date is going to leave.

I am 1000% not opening that can of worms today or going down that rabbit hole, but I did want to mention it in case it is a seed or starting point for you in some self-reflection. 

Mixed signals are different from signals you don’t like. 

This is a massively important distinction to be aware of. If you are consistently getting signals that tell you one thing (that you don’t like), don’t mistake those for mixed signals. Mixed signals are when you get separate signals that mean two totally different things. Signals that are all consistent but aren’t what you want to hear are not mixed at all. 

This might sound basic to some of you, but I promise you it gets mixed up all the time.  

If someone is giving you signals that say one thing, whether you like it or not, believe them. Don’t chalk it up to mixed signals just because you don’t like what they mean. 

Seriously, just ask 

To close, I know I’m going to sound like a broken record here, but my goal is to help you with the issue you’re dealing with so I’m going to do it anyway. If there is something that you are unsure about in your relationship, no matter how long you’ve been together or dating, ask them about it directly.